The journey so far

Okay, I totally have no excuse for bailing for the past weeks like I did but this is wishing that after some explanations, I may be forgiven.

You see, as the Christmas breeze was blowing all and sundry, a bit of it got to me too. Normally, I am not supposed to be ranting today without first posting some Bollywood sweetings but again, give me a pass today please.

So, I travelled with my family by road to the east for the festivities and boy did that journey rack my nerves. First and foremost, I had to wake up really early for someone who loves her sleep. Then I woke my poor baby too to prepare for the movement. All this was in a bid to hit the road on time, avoid traffic and get to Imo State earlier than normal but then again, the saying still goes 'Man proposes, God disposes'.

We set off with my hubby at the wheel and me and my little soon snoring away few hours after movement. I kept waking and sleeping back hoping each time that we may have covered a reasonable distance by the time I forced my eyes open. Imagine my suprise at 9.00am when I opened my eyes to see my hubby driving into a mechanic. We were just at Ore.

'What happened?" I asked. " The exhaust and brake pads have got issues" was hubby's response. Long story short, we spent another 2 hours, 30 minutes fixing it with those money-sucking Ore mechanics demanding cash as though we had a tree of money planted in the booth of our car. That Ore road sha! Bumps everywhere psheew!

Mummy’s Wednesday: A parent’s responsibility is for a lifetime

You know what I was thinking the other day after my chat with a friend and colleague? I got to thinking that as a parent, your responsibility to your child doesn’t end one day; it actually lasts till the day you breathe your last.

I am married but frankly, my mum still acts her part in my life. Well, maybe I don’t get to disturb her for financial assistance like I did when I lived under her roof but in many more ways, I still call on her.

There comes a time in some people’s lives when they begin to think their parents are crowding in on their spaces. They begin to feel like their parents are calling too much, expecting to be called but truth is, they have always been that way only while the child grows and becomes independent, the mother tends to still be the mother she has always been.

A male friend once complained that whenever his mother came to visit him, she keeps calling him up if he isn’t home yet by 1am. He claims he is sick and tired or her treating him like a child while he is a grown man.

Married but going ring-less

It really bugs me this commitment thing. I grew up knowing that when a man got married to a woman, the physical symbol that tells the whole world they are taken is the wedding band but recently, it seems that orientation had taken the back seat.

I also seem to notice that this trend of dumping the wedding band sometime in the marriage is applicable to the men and rarely the women. Well, correct me if am wrong.

My opinion of men who don’t wear their wedding rings is that they are unfaithful and don’t regard their spouse but again I have seen scores whose wedding rings shine like its polished everyday but they cheat like there is no tomorrow. This then begs my question today: Irrespective of a person’s lifestyle and beliefs, are they required to wear their wedding bands once they say ‘I do’?

Call me old fashioned or anything else but I am of the belief that it is a sign of respect to one’s spouse when the wedding ring is worn. It seems to say, ‘Am married and proud of it and my spouse’.

Bollywood Tuesday: Pyaar Impossible – Chasing after love(2)

Happy Tuesday folks...

Not much pleasantries today, let's just get on with it. The first part of this installment can be viewed here.

Here goes...

Abhay is glued to the spot as he stares at Alisha. She looks different but in a very good way. Maturity had done a beautiful job on her. She wore her hair in a short bob now as against the flowing hair she had years ago and she looked absolutely amazing in her very short corporate wear. Yes, he is staring at Alisha and the flood of emotions he has bottled in for years threaten to overcome him.

While he still basks in the happiness of seeing her, she suddenly goes into the building bringing his fantasy and happiness to a sudden halt. He makes to follow her but holds back. He afterwards gives in to curiosity and the need to really meet Alisha when he sees her suddenly come out again from the office to flag down a cab. He wonders what the hurry is all about but when she gets into the cab, he hops another and follows her. 

The case of the 'missing' N2.1bn from the mint

I know I have been away for a long time now trying to battle the illness that threatened to keep me from writing and in fact doing a lot of things but it is strange that upon recovery, I am again struck by a certain news about thjis country that makes me wonder when I will hear anything better.

I am sure you must have heard the story making rounds on the media about the N2.1billion that suddenly developed legs and walked out of the nation's mint. I am still trying to wrap my dizzy head around that sort of happening. If I were told that one piece of one thousand naira note disappered, I probably would have shrugged and asked for another story to be told to me but how can an amount equivalent to at least $100million just disappear like that?

This country is one where people perpetrate crimes against the entire nation but somehow walk away scot-free and in the near future appear bearing flags wishing for votes from citizens to rule in one office or the other. Yes, someone has been sent on an indefinite suspension with regards to the missing money but is that enough? When the investigations being carried out reveal a particular person behind the crime, will he be punished?

Mummy's Wednesday: Loving one child more than the other

In my home, my mum had all six of us. I am the second child and in all my years of growing up with my family, I never felt like any one of us was more loved by either our father or mother than the rest.

The love and level of discipline shown was the same to every single one of us.

That said, it then worries me when some parents actually say it proudly that one of their children is their favorite. While it may be true that one child out of the rest may resemble the mother and do things exactly like the mother would want, I think that for the sake of the other children who you carried in your womb; you shouldn't pick one over the other. Favoritism has done more harm than good in most families than you will ever know.

While in secondary school, I knew a girl who hated her younger sister so much you wouldn't believe they were from the same parents. The reason was simple; their mother loved her sister more and showed it at every given time. When the younger sister wanted anything, she got it but it wasn't same for her. She didn't care why her mum always compared her to her sister, she didn't even make any efforts to change and be like her sister in a bid to get her mother's love ( For that was probably the mother's reason for the comparison in the first place); all she knew was that her sister was taking away all her shine and love.

My rant on the thin line between evil and good

Lots of evil things happening in the world today makes us forget sometimes that there are still those kind hearted individuals around. Somehow, even good deeds these days are questioned.

I read the news about ritualists taking advantage of the Abuja carnivals, posing as beggars to steal body parts of individuals. Yes, you heard right! When someone took pity on one of the beggars and gave out some money, a part of the body or even sight disappears with it.

When I first came to Lagos, I was in the habit of trying in my little way to help out beggars I saw on the streets. One day I began to think to myself; these beggars are not reducing at all, instead they are on the increase. I still gave when my spirit told me to but one day, a lady whom I usually dressed my hair at her salon told me that some of these beggars are actually sent by rich men to collect people’s cash and then use it for ritual purposes. She told me she never gives money to beggars.

Also, gone are the days you see someone in pains on the road and stop to help. Now, criminals use that gimmick and even smarter ones to rob unsuspecting persons of their valuables and in some cases lives. This begs the question, what is this world really turning into? A world where you ache to give help but are afraid it is a set-up. One where you do good and the act is questioned.

Throwback Thursday: Remembering ‘Where There is No Doctor’

On today’s Throwback, I am remembering that book that served as the internet back in the days when health concerns arose. I believe many of you are familiar with the book named ‘Where there is no doctor’.

That book was in almost every home I visited while I was growing up. Unlike today when any symptom we notice in our body, we quickly hit Google and some other health websites, back in the days, any symptom parents noticed, they flipped open Where There is No Doctor. It somehow had answers to majority of health questions and offered cures.

The book according to Wikipedia is the most widely used health education book in tropical and sub-tropical developing countries. The book was originally written by David Werner, Carol Thuman, Jane Maxwell  in 1970 in Spanish as Donde No Hay Doctor and has since then been revised multiple times. It has sold over one million copies and has been translated into over 100 languages. It has also been made into a CD and some portions of it can be downloaded free of charge in pdf format.

Mummy’s Wednesday: Mothers, pray for your children

When a woman gets pregnant, it is the sheer power and will of God that sees her through the many months and the eventual safe delivery of the child. It is only right then that we acknowledge that intense supernatural power at work in our lives and in the birthing of our little one.

The bible says ‘ Pray without ceasing’ because let’s face it, we are at war everyday whether we realize it or not.

It’s only when you understand the dubious, deceptive and manipulative way the devil and his cohorts operate that you begin to understand why a driver will get drunk and hit an innocent pedestrian. Then you will understand why a grown-up man will see a little girl and sexually molest her.

When we have understood just little how dangerously the devil operates without sleeping a wink, we then realize the need to pray always for our children. From the moment the baby pops out of you, he has become your sole responsibility. You don’t just have the responsibility to provide emotionally, financially and physically for the child, you have to provide spiritual support which quite frankly is the most important.

Curious case: Meet the men who are aging backwards

By the looks of their home, Tony and Christine Clark are raising two rambunctious 7-year-old boys. Model train tracks and Monopoly pieces are scattered on tables and cartoons flicker on the TV set.

But the Clarks' two sons are grown men who share only the same interests and emotional fluctuations of little boys. Like the character portrayed by Brad Pitt in the 2008 film  " The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttons",

Matthew, 39, and Michael, 42, are aging backwards.

Diagnosed with a terminal form of leukodystrophy, one of a group of extremely rare genetic disorders that attack the Myelin, or white matter, in the nervous system, spinal cord, and brain. In the Clarks' case, the condition has not only eroded their physical capacities, but their emotional and mental states as well. 

Only six years ago, both brothers were holding down jobs and growing their families. Today, they spend their days in the care of their parents, both in their sixties, playing with Mr. Potato Head, fighting over Monopoly, and in rare lucid moments, struggling to understand why their lives have changed so dramatically.